Empty nest

I have two girls. One is 21 and another 17.

I am Singaporean but we live in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia. My youngest is currently sitting for her GCE A levels and her last paper will be on November 17th. She has clearly stated her intention of continuing her studies in Singapore and eventually both my girls will live and work there.

I have always been an independent person. I used to backpack alone in Asia and Europe in my 20s and never thought about marriage. But motherhood changes everything. I left my broadcasting job when my second child was born and we moved to KL as my husband is based here. Unlike in Singapore, I am not allowed to work in Malaysia if I am on a dependent or guardian visa. So the past 17 years I have been busy caring for my family and being a CEO, CFO, councillor, consultant, chef, driver and many more roles.

Getting my Yoga certification was a game changer as it allowed me to teach and continue to learn and expand my horizon with new friendships and experiences. Thank God for social media, I am connected to friends back home and my interests.

But now with my girls becoming young adults, I am feeling the pang of the empty nest. I think some parents can definitely relate to this especially if you are very close to them. But they have to plan their lives and I can only guide.

So now is the time for me to carve my future and learn to grow. 

Yoga definitely helps. Daily meditation helps me to be present and silent the mind.

I think many mothers can relate to how I feel and maybe also fathers.

If you are reading this, please share what is your coping mechanism in this phase of your life.

*Photo taken when my second daughter was 8 years old.

Tight Yoga wear or modest Yoga wear, its still me :-)

In the video, you see two Norzas. 

One in the common yoga gear and another covered. So which is the real Norza? Both are the real Norza.

I was previously the Yogini who loves to wear the sleeveless top, tights and free hair. But now to be authentically me, I am the covered Yogini. But if I am at home practicing with no photos to be taken there’s no need for me to be covered. Its me practicing both my loves. My faith and my Yoga.

Yes they can marry!

There are certain aspects of Yoga that has helped me to move closer to my faith. (I do not practice the mantras). 

Pranayama(breathing).

I feel proper breathing has helped me to be more focus when I do my prayers.  One movement, one breath. My prayers have sitting and sitting positions, forward bend, slight twist to right and also slight neck movements, to the right and left to complete the prayer. Its a set of movements varied only by the number of times the ‘flow’ is done depending on the time of day. There are 5 times. Sunrise, afternoon, late afternoon, sunset and evening. Its meant to reset, realign and recalibrate oneself. Each prayer is like a meditation.

Proper breathing had helped me to be in the moment when I recite my prayers and internalise it.I do try to practice mindfulness on and off the mat. I must say sometimes its challenging when your mind flies off somewhere else when you are doing something. I am only human ya. But the beauty of  it is, you catch yourself and drag yourself to be present.

This reminds me of a book I read ICHIGO ICHIE by Hector Garcia nad Francesc Miralles. ICHIGO ICHIE is the Japanese art of making the most of every moment, the Japanese way. So whatever you experience at the moment, be present, embrace the moment. When you are with somebody, celebrate the moment. Appreciate the company as a gift. Reading this, I felt what a beautiful way of describing a meeting. I think when there is honesty and joy in the meeting, you can feel it in your heart.

Another nugget I want to share here from the book is about savouring a moment like it is our last breath. To really feel and give ourselves permission to be happy. There are times I think when we hold back our happiness. We forget the child in us. We say adults do not do that. This is where Yoga comes in. It allows and encourages you to PLAY and gives you space to tumble, fall, laugh and not to take yourself too seriously especially when you are not able to execute a certain pose. You get up and try again. If you fall, its ok. You can smile and even laugh. Well maybe your body does not allow you to do that today. You do not take it personally

Satya(truthfulness)

To practice this, I have to be authentic to myself. This is reflected externally in how I present myself fashion wise. Honestly, it took me awhile to come out with a modest look which I think is me. One which seamlessly represents me, regardless whether I am covered or not. I think I am at peace with my new look. There are many covered Yoginis on instagram too and they look fabulous.

So if you wonder how does covering affects me as a Yogini? It does not. Whether freehair or covered, I practice and I teach with Intention.

So how do you practice truthfulness in your daily life?